Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran Taking A Stand Surah Al-Imran (The House of Imran) Chapter 3: Verse 139 "So lose not heart, nor fall into despair: For you must gain mastery if you are true in Faith." When a Muslim loses his physical power and is conquered, one's consciousness (taqwa) and faith (iman) does not depart from him. If one remains a Believer, he or she looks upon his or her conqueror from a superior position. One remains certain that this is a temporary condition which will pass away and that faith will turn the tide from which there is no escape. Even if death is his portion, he will never bow his head. It is the wisdom of God that belief remains independent of the glitter and glamour of worldly allurements, such as closeness to the ruler, favour from the government, popularity among the people or the satisfaction of desire. Indeed, the Believer does not borrow his or her values, concepts and standards from people, but takes them from the Sustainer of the people, God, and that is sufficient for the Believer. The person who takes a stand against the direction of the society - its common mode, its values and standards, its ideas and concepts, its error and deviations - will find himself or herself a stranger, as well as helpless, unless his or her authority comes from a source which is more powerful than the people, more permanent than the earth, and nobler than life. Let falsehood have power, let it have its drums and banners, and let it have its throngs and mobs; all this cannot change anything of the truth. He or she is a Believer, and whatever be the conditions and the situation, he or she cannot exchange error for the truth. Indeed, God does not leave the Believer alone in the face of oppression to whimper under its weight, to suffer dejection and grief, but relieves him of all this with the message: "So lose not heart, nor fall into despair: For you must gain mastery if you are true in Faith." Compiled From: "The Noble Quran" - Abdullah Yusuf Ali, "Milestones" - Sayyid Qutb, pp. 274-279

Understanding the Prophet's Life Hygiene The practice of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is to be always clean, wearing fresh and neat-looking dress and having a pleasant fragrance. Imam al-Bukhari narrates the Prophet saying, "Allah will forgive the sins of the previous week for a person, who on Friday takes a bath, cleanses himself, puts on his [regular] perfume or any perfume available in the house. Then, he goes out [to Friday Prayer] and avoids separating two friends. Then he prayers wherever he can and listens to [the sermon of] the Imam." To take a bath on Friday is specifically required as it is the 'weekly Eid' of Muslims and a time for gathering and joy for the community in their homes and masjids. That of course does not mean that one should bathe only on Fridays but as often as is necessary for optimal health and hygiene. The Prophet did not set aside any specific time for bathing and would do so whenever he wished to, sometimes even in the middle of the night as Lady 'Aisha reported! Do not forget to keep with you a small bottle of perfume and to use it regularly to bring pleasure to yourself and those around you, as the ahadith clearly recommend. It is loved by humans and angels alike, and Allah loves what pleases His creation. Compiled From: "Islamic Manners" - Abdul Fattah Abu Ghudda

Blindspot! Paths to Peace Only in the crucible of self-mastery can freedom be smelted. Far from how others see us, far from our constant complaining, we all have a deep need for silence and introspection: the silence of our conscience. We need to listen to our hearts, to recognize our needs. Islam—like all spiritual traditions—teaches that we can never fully realize ourselves, never attain our freedom by acting against others, or in relation to the judgments—founded or unfounded—of others. To be means to return to our conscience, to our intelligence and our heart, and to pledge, to the full extent of our abilities, to know and to educate ourselves. Knowledge of God, the Qur’an reminds us, lies “between man and his heart”: God invites us to know ourselves, to rely upon our conscience, to seek responsibility. But above all God summons us to understand our faith, our practice as believers and ourselves. The Unique calls upon humans to become beings of conscience, to take themselves fully in hand and to become—overcoming all obstacles—forces for good, for human well-being and peace. It is time to stop lamenting if life fails to ease our suffering and our tears. Muslims must reconcile themselves with the full force of this message. Must rediscover the Divine One in intimate dialogue, and then, in confidence, find themselves. Must become responsible: such is the first freedom. Never lose hope: such is the ultimate message of Islam. To be, to know one’s self, to be thankful and to serve in the deep belief that peace lies in the intention and the meaning of all we do, and not in the visibility of the result or the sound of applause. The philosopher noticed: “What does not kill you makes you stronger”… life, which by definition does not definitely kill us, must be the way that strengthen us spiritually. Time, confidence and silence will be required; we must learn to care for ourselves. Islam needs Muslims—women and men—who understand its teachings, who attempt to live by them and who bear witness before humanity and Nature of its simple, luminous and yet demanding message: if you believe you seek; when you seek you love; if you love you serve; when you serve, you pray. Self-reconciliation, the empowerment of autonomy and freedom, can only come about through the mediation of those around us, with their respect, and in their service. Like the signs of the universe that remind us of the signs of our deepest intimacy, like the order of the cosmos that reflects peace of heart, we must learn, understand, step outside ourselves. To love and to serve means to step outside ourselves: to step outside ourselves holds the promise of self-reconciliation. A paradox, and such a beautiful truth. Compiled From: "Paths to Peace" - Tariq Ramadan

Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran More Than An Act Surah Baqarah (The Cow) Chapter 2: Verse 37 "Then learnt Adam from his Lord words of inspiration, and his Lord Turned towards him; for He is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful." Quranic concept of Taubah is essentially an intimate, personal act. Indeed, it is more than an act. It reflects a moment of decision when one makes up one's mind to break with a course of action and simultaneously adopt another course. Taubah is not merely the negation of the past; it is essentially a contract with the future. Taubah is personal in that no one else needs to know about it. You do not have to go into a confessional to make a clean breast of all your sins, nor do you have to appear in sack cloth and ashes to convince any authority that you have truly turned penitent. While punishment relates to the act of wrong and satisfies the social conscience, taubah deals with the wrongness of the act and satisfies the conscience of the individual concerned. Taubah is the result of man's understanding of the wrongness of an act and his determination not to repeat the act. Once he has come to this decision he turns to God for mercy and forgiveness. This process of repentance and forgiveness started with Adam. When Adam violated the covenant he found himself exposed. He desperately tried to cover himself but was transfixed as it were, by a cosmic eye. In mute helplessness he turned to God for mercy. Compiled From: "Translations from The Quran" - Altaf Gauhar, pp, 153, 154

Understanding the Prophet's Life Bringing Ease When two of the Prophet's (peace be upon him) Companions, Muadh b. Jabal and Abu Musa al-Ashari (may Allah be pleased with them both) were leaving as judges to the Yemen, the Prophet instructed them to: "Be gentle to the people and avoid harshness to them; bring them good news and scare them not." [Muslim] With regard to the implementation of penalties, the Prophet instructed the judges and rulers to 'Suspend the prescribed punishments (hudud) as far as you can. For it is better to err in forgiveness than making an error in punishment.' [Abu Yusuf] In a hadith narrated by the Prophet's widow, Aisha, and recorded by both al-Bukhari and Muslim, the Prophet said: "God is gentle and he loves gentleness in all matters." Then he confirmed in another hadith to say that: "Gentleness fails not to bring beauty in everything, and it is not taken away from anything without causing ugliness." [Muslim] A juristic conclusion drawn from these guidelines is that bringing ease to the people and removal of hardship from them is one of the cardinal objectives of Shariah. Hence it is not permissible for a mufti, judge or jurist to opt for a harsh verdict in cases where an easier alternative can be found. Compiled From: "Shariah Law - An Introduction" - Mohammad Hashim Kamali, pp, 292-294

Blindspot! Desirable News If we allow ourselves to imagine a different kind of news, there are a number of features that might be desirable from a democratic standpoint: Independent issue agendas developed by each news organization would provide a more diverse information environment. Offering diverse voices and viewpoints would reduce the gap that ordinary people often feel separates them from the politicians and political insiders who dominate news content. More analysis of how politics operates behind the scenes of news events would help people understand how political decisions are reached and how they might become involved. More historical context would help establish the origins of problems in the news and limit the ability of politicians to reinvent history to suit their purposes. More coverage of citizen political activists would help ordinary people see paths to personal involvement and hear challenging perspectives that might help them evaluate official spin more critically. Better use of interactive technologies could link news audiences to each other and to civic organizations to learn more about issues and take effective action. Compiled From: "News: The Politics of Illusion" - W. Lance Bennett, pp. 30, 31

Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran Iniquity Surah Yunus (Jonah) Chapter 10: Verse 23 (partial) "O you people, surely your iniquity is but against your selves." Iniquity is defined as harming anything in creation without just cause. The word is a translation of baghi, which is derived from the Arabic word that denotes desire. In this context, the problem is desiring something to the point of transgressing the rights of others to attain it. The iniquity and injustice that people aim at others ultimately work against the perpetrators. Imam Mawlud makes an analogy between iniquity and a powerfully intoxicating wine (called qarqaf) that makes one shudder when swallowed. This metaphorical wine is the "love of position," which is a major motivation that impels some to wrong others. Even petty office managers oppress their subordinates for the purpose of marking their territory and securing their positions. Tyrants on corporate boards pull off power plays to acquire more authority or remove those whom they perceive to be potential challenges to their authority or position. But the world's most powerful leaders, after finally achieving what they so badly coveted, taste death. All their power abruptly vanishes at death's door, the great leveler. Their minions die just the same, those who did whatever they could to move closer to people of authority. Compiled From: "Purification of the Heart" - Hamza Yusuf, pp, 32, 33

Understanding the Prophet's Life Responsibility Even before birth, when a man is merely an embryo in the womb of his mother, certain responsibilities are prescribed for him. Bukhari relates on the authority of Zaid ibn Masud that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said: "Each one of you is collected in the womb of his mother for forty days, and then turns into a clot for an equal period, and turns into a piece of flesh for a similar period and then Allah sends an angel and orders him to write four things, i.e., his provision, his age at death, and whether he will be of the wretched or the blessed. Then the soul is breathed into him. And by Allah, a person among you may do deeds of the People of Fire until there is only a cubit or an arm-length distance between him and the fire but then the writing precedes, and he does the deeds of the People of Paradise and enters it; and a man does the deeds of the People of Paradise till there is only a cubit or two between him and Paradise, and then that writing precedes and he does the deeds of the People of the Fire and enters it." [Bukhari, Ahmed, Muslim] It is wrong to think that this tradition is in conflict with the capability of man for responsibility. This hadith intends to underline three things: First, it warns pious people against such evils as may ruin their good deeds, like pride, vainglory, hypocrisy, and other hidden evils that can render all of a person's good deeds in vain. Second, it gives hope to those who have wronged themselves, for it is still possible for them to substitute the humiliation that accompanies sin for the honour that always goes with obedience to Allah's will. This assurance is likely to strengthen their resolve at a crucial moment and change their attitude from evil to good. Third, it draws the attention of both the faithful and the sinful to Allah. If one seeks help from Allah and places trust in Him, one's hidden capabilities and faculties develop and one finds it easy to perform the acts that please Allah, while keeping away from those that invoke His wrath. This three-fold purpose creates in man a sense of responsibility that leads him onto the straight path. Compiled From: "Freedom and Responsibility in Quranic Perspective" - Hasan Al-Anani, pp, 43, 44

Blindspot! Ordinary and Uncool One destructive obsession related to perfectionism is the fascination with celebrity culture. We desperately flip through magazines to find out all of the intimate details about the stars we love and the ones we hate. We want to know who has lost weight, how they decorate their houses, what they eat, what they feed their dogs ... you name it. If they eat it, wear it, own it or lose it - we want to do the same! We want to share in their lives because we believe it's the way to bring us closer to the perfection we seek. Celebrities also bring us closer to another highly coveted asset - coolness. Unfortunately, in a culture driven by profit, there are multibillion-dollar industries making sure that perfection and coolness stay as elusive as they are seductive. There is no such thing as perfect enough or cool enough. In our culture, the fear and shame of being ordinary is very real. We seem to measure the value of people's contributions (and sometimes their entire lives) by their level of public recognition. In other words, worth is measured by fame and fortune. Our culture is quick to dismiss quiet, hardworking men and women. In many instances, we equate ordinary with boring or, even more dangerous, ordinary has become synonymous with meaningless. One of the greatest cultural consequences of devaluing our own lives has been our tolerance for what people do to achieve their "extraordinary" status. Baseball players who pump themselves full of steroids and hormones are heroes. Corporate leaders with billion-dollar salary packages are envied, even if their employees are losing their pensions and benefits at the same time. Young children are overstressed and suffering from high rates of anxiety due to the overscheduling of extracurricular activities and the emphasis on standardized testing scores. These examples beg the question, what are we willing to sacrifice in our pursuit of the extraordinary? Compiled From: "I Thought It Was Just Me" - Brene Brown, pp. 203-205

Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran Law of Requital Surah Al-Fatiha (The Opening) Chapter 1: Verse 4 "Master of the Day of Judgement" Evil takes many forms but it always contains some element of transgression, excess, waste, misapplication or disorder and implies deliberate pursuit of these ends. The struggle between good and evil is decided according to the law of requital, which is subordinate to the divine purpose that good must ultimately outweigh evil and falsehood must yield place to truth. Without this not only would the essential balance be disturbed, the whole object of creation would be frustrated. The law of requital is in operation all the time but the final determination awaits the Day of Judgement when God as judge and master will 'decide the issue'. The concept of the hereafter is inseparable from the process of evolution. It is arbitrary to assume that this process which governs growth and decay, selection and survival, generation and regeneration at different levels of existence, should come to an abrupt and final end in physical death. Compiled From: "Translations from The Quran" - Altaf Gauhar, p. 70

Understanding the Prophet's Life Puffing Aisha (God be well pleased with her and her father) said, "Each night when the Prophet, peace be upon him, retired to his bed he would gather his hands together, puff in them, and then recite in them [Surat al-Ikhlas, Surat al-Falaq, and Surat al-Nas] and then wipe over with his hands whatever he could of his body, beginning with his head and face and the front of his body. He would do this three times." [Bukhari, Muslim] Aisha also said, "When he became exhausted I would puff for him [with Surat al-Falaq and Surat al-Nas], and wipe with his own hand for its blessings." And in some narrations: "When he became sick he would read over himself [Surat al-Ikhlas, Surat al-Falaq and Surat al-Nas] and then puffed." [Bukhari, Muslim, Ahmad] The linguists said that "puffing" [al-nafath] is a light breath without saliva. Compiled From: "Etiquette With The Quran" - Imam Al-Nawawi, p. 104

Blindspot! Busy Days Some imagine that their days would be less busy in the future, that there would be fewer problems and obstacles, and that they will have more free time than during the past youth. However, experience shows quite the opposite, dear reader, so let me quote to you from the one who experienced that and concluded: The older you get, the greater your responsibilities will be, the more relations you will have, the more restricted your time will be and the lesser your energy. Time is more restricted after youth, and one's body is weaker, health is less abundant, vitality is lower and duties and preoccupations are more numerous and more severe! Hence, make use of your time while it is available to you, and do not attach your heart to the unknown, for each stage has its own occupations, duties and surprises. Some even stress the lack of days of happiness and the abundance of days of hardship: They say life is all two days One is pleasures and one is hardships They were not truthful, for life is one day of happiness And many days full of hardships and surprises Compiled From: "The Value of Time" - Abd al-Fattah Abu Ghuddah, pp. 74, 75

February Book Club Pick

This month's pick is Hearts We Lost by Umm Zakiyyah. Has anyone read last month's choice? I started but didn't finish it. I'm really looking forward to this choice though as I loved her previous books.

Malaysia - Part 3

Oh...the bumpy boat ride. It was like a horrible roller coaster for me. It threw you high in the sky and then you came crashing down on your uncushioned boat seat. Pain was a constant friend for almost the entire boat ride. Hubby said he felt that way too but the kids seemed just fine and were shrieking with joy while I did so in pain. The few other passengers were stoic and looked at us like we were weirdos. Back in Canada a friend told me we must have taken the fast boat (took an hour to get to the island) instead of the nice slow boat. Turns out she was right and the quick boat was cheaper. Had I known Malay I would have realized we had a better choice! So much for that. Then there was the difficulty of getting out of  the boat to the jetty especially with my leg troubles. Once we got to the island though,oh joy , oh bliss. I thought this is like Paradise and the trip was like dunia and I don't ever want to leave Perhentian Island.

Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran Choosing Commitment Surah Hud (Hud) Chapter 11: Verse 118 "Had your Lord willed, He would have made all people one and the same nation! But they will remain differentiated." Islam is the essence of all divine religions and is the mission of all Prophets from Adam to Muhammad, upon them be peace. It is the universal call directed to all men of all times and places without discrimination. The Arabs were called upon to raise the banner of Islam not because they were racially or culturally superior to their contemporaries, but in order that they, too, might do their share of commitment to the religion of God and make their contributions to humanity. It was precisely for this reason that Muhammad, peace be upon him, sometimes felt distressed when he saw some people turning their backs to the call of God. Righteous, and concerned as he was, and knowing what Islam meant for humanity, Muhammad believed and hoped that every man would naturally accept Islam without reservation. But this did not come through, and Muhammad like any other committed human being, experienced some frustration. To overcome this frustration, God revealed to him verses like this. No leader can afford to be indifferent to his commitment and to those around him. On the other hand, he cannot afford to be possessed by excessive enthusiasm about things beyond his control, for this may well shatter his personality and destroy his entire purpose. True, he is committed and responsible for his commitment. True, too, he must do his utmost to honour his commitment. But we must remember that responsibility is proportionate to man's capacity and potential. Between these two poles of indifference and excessive enthusiasm, there is a very wide range for great actions and achievements. God has created diverse people and has offered them the chance to participate in the shaping of history. He has created them differentiated so that they might know one another, be free to choose their commitments, and be responsible for their choice. This means that the business of the committed people is unfinished and their responsibility never ceases. This, in turn, gives the committed a sense of continuity, a goal, and a dynamism of motivation. Compiled From: Islam: A Way of Life and a Movement, "Islam and Humanity" - Hammudah Abdalati, pp. 101, 102

Understanding the Prophet's Life Gentleness and Moderation If an insult or a curse is reciprocated on the spur of the moment, then it must be within the limits of moderation. This is aptly illustrated by the Hadith, reported by both Al-Bukhari and Muslim, concerning a group of Jews who came to visit the Prophet, peace be upon him. When they addressed him with the distorted phrase 'may death be upon you (al-sam alaykum)' instead of the familiar Islamic greeting, 'peace be upon you (al-salam alaykum)', the Prophet's wife, Aishah replied with these words, 'may death and curse be upon you (al-sam alaykum wa al-lanah)'. Upon hearing this, the Prophet told his wife: 'O Aishah, God Most High loves gentleness', to which she replied, 'Did you not hear what they said?' And the Prophet said, 'Yes, but you could have just said "and upon you (wa alaykum)".' Gentleness and moderation are among the most desirable features of the Islamic ethos which God and His Messenger have repeatedly recommended. These attributes are the real antidote to cursing and insult; they adorn everything to which they are applied, and beautify every occasion. Islam sets no bounds on gentleness and moderation. Compiled From: "Freedom of Expression in Islam" - Mohammad Hashim Kamali, p. 185

Blindspot! Otherness In a culture of shame, we are constantly overwhelmed with feelings of fear, blame and disconnection. This creates an "us and them" world. There are people like us, and then there are "those other people." And, we normally work very hard to insulate ourselves from "those people." As children, there were the people that we were allowed to hang out with and then there were the other kids. There were the schools we went to and there were schools for the other kids. As adults, we live in the neighbourhood where our kind live - the other neighbourhoods are for the other folks. We emotionally and physically insulate ourselves from "the other." It never seems to end. We've developed language to describe the others - sometimes we refer to them as "those people" or the even more mysterious "people like that." The truth is ... we are the others. Most of us are one paycheck, one divorce, one drug-addicted kid, one mental health diagnosis, one serious illness, one sexual assault, or one drinking binge away from being "those people" - the ones we don't trust, the ones we pity, the ones we don't let our children play with, the ones bad things happen to, the ones we don't want living next door. We use the concept of otherness to insulate ourselves and to disconnect. Sharing our shame with someone is painful, and just sitting with someone who is sharing his or her shame story with us can be equally painful. The natural tendency to avoid or reduce this pain is often why we start to judge and insulate ourselves using otherness. We basically blame them for their experience. We unconsciously divide people into two camps: worthy of our support and unworthy. The concept of labeling people worthy or unworthy is not new. If you look at the history of charity and philanthropy, going as far back as written history, those needing help have always been separated into the deserving poor or the undeserving poor. This thinking has become part of our culture. You can see it in our public policy, our neighbourhoods and in our families. It plays out on an individual level exactly like it plays out at the community level. Compiled From: "I Thought It Was Just Me" - Brene Brown, pp. 145-148

Healthy Journey Part 8

Its been ages since I've spoken about my health but here goes. Last spring I finished the Nadoona program and I lost 22lbs even with my broken toe. I mostly went swimming! Things were going along pretty good until Ramadan when I had a miscarriage which was my 12th pregnancy; my 11th also ending in miscarriage. In September something very horrible happened and sent me into a tailspin and my health went downhill again. At the BeingMe conference I was barely able to walk and used my daughters shoulders as my supports. May Allah reward them. Amin. At the conference the NutraBee lady gave me some special honey called BeePower to take. I also got cupping the day after. These things helped me but what really helped me was going to Malaysia after 12 yrs and having my husband take me to all the places I hadn't gotten to see the first time and seeing all my in-laws and the sunshine and everything. I have been doing fine since then alhumdullilah. In November I also got tested for Lyme Disease since in August I found a tic on me and also Lupus. Both tests came back negative. The blood tests did show that I am low in iron so I am now taking iron supplements.  I am still not sure of what I really have. Is it MS like my doctor thinks or a virus like my neurologist thinks?  After RIS I tried to get cupping again but she was busy but just last week I got it done again.Also this January I started to take Flax Seed Oil and Unrefined Coconut Oil both from SweetSunnah which helped me to feel the soles of my feet for the first time in 2 years! Alhumdullilah. May Allah give you all great health and for those who have it be EXTREMELY grateful.

Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran Constant Striving Surah al-Qasas (The Stories) Chapter 28: Verses 56 "You [O Muhammad] guide not whom you like but God guides whom He wills. And He knows best those who receive guidance." Constant striving is an essential feature of delivering the Message, as well as an important element of the Prophetic method. A Prophet is, so to speak, obsessed with how to perform his duty. With that goal always uppermost, he considers all circumstances and does everything permitted. As he is not responsible for the results, he leaves them to God. He knows that he cannot cause anyone to accept the Message, for he is only sent to convey it as effectively as possible. Many Prophets lived with no one accepting their Message. However, they did not lose heart, weaken, or resort to such improper means as violence, terror, or deception even when faced with relentless hardship and torture. When the Prophet, peace be upon him, was severely wounded at Uhud, some Companions asked him to invoke God's curse on the enemy. Instead, he prayed for them, saying: "O God, forgive my people, because they don't know." He did this while his face was covered with blood. Compiled From: "The Messenger of God: Muhammad" - Fethullah Gulen, p. 77

Understanding the Prophet's Life Domestic Leader The Prophet's household consisted of several wives and daughters, and had its problems as does any human household. Under the leadership of the great husband, peace was the eminent feature of life and strife the exception. It was the Prophet who said: "The most perfect in faith among the believers are those who possess the best morals, and the best among you are those who are kindest to their wives" (Tirmidhi). This statement is indeed very significant for it gives a profound criterion through which humanity may measure its elevation or its failure. Women are always treated unjustly during ages of ignorance because of their physical weakness. Yet the Prophet of Islam gives this human touch and makes the criterion of good behaviour the way a man treats his wife. Compiled From: Islam: The Way of Revival, "The Way of the Prophet" - Muhammad Qutb, p. 129

Blindspot! Framework for Life The only way to live by the Quran is to live life as the Prophet Muhammad, may God bless him and grant him peace, lived it, for his life was the Quran in practice. His example is the surest guide to its meaning and Message. If you want to 'see' the Quran then look at the Prophet's life. The best way to understand the Quran and follow its Message is to learn what the Prophet said, spend hours and hours in his company, follow in his footsteps and cast yourself in the mould that he left behind. The Quran provides the essential framework for human life. But the Prophet and his Sunna proved us with the details of that framework. If you desire to know what type of person the Quran wants you to be and what type of society the Quran wants you to create, you only need to look at the Prophet's life history. Compiled From: "In The Early Hours" - Kurram Murad, pp. 85, 86

My trip to Malaysia -part 2.

Well after months of only being able to read about my landing in KL, you will now get to read and delight in the next part of my trip. After KL we took a small plane to Kota Bharu where my husband is from originally. There we stayed at his older sister's house which was quite an upgrade from his parents house that I stayed at 12 yrs ago. His parents house is a wooden house on stilts to avoid the floods. His sister's house is a stucco house with two levels. So this time I did not have to fight off lizards, rats, mice and bats. There was also air conditioning with wall units along with the fans. Also this time I was able to be more comfortable as there were no males for the majority of the time I was there. The last time I went I had to keep my hijab on 24/7 because I was staying with my in-laws which included my brother-in-law. After we had settled in we went to Tesco which is fairly new there and brand new to me in every way as Canada doesn't have that store as its British in origin. There we saw a donut store. Donuts are becoming more popular in Malaysia. I went to the Peace store for women but didn't find anything I liked in my size. My daughter (13) discovered Cool Blog which is not a blog at all but a drinks store. She fell in love with that place and kept going back to it during our trip for more. At this mall there is a kids play area but you have to pay for everything there. The guy looking after the area looked completely bored. After 2 days of being in KB we drove to Terrannganu to catch a boat to go to Perhentian Island. It turned out to be the worst boat ride of my life!

What are you reading?

So this January I have read a little of my book club book but I've mostly been reading two other books which in fact I've finished. The first one is Reclaim Your Heart by Yasmin Mogahed who I have heard speak live twice; once at the Being Me conference and the second time at RIS. The first time her book sold out before I could get my hands on it and the second time she did not confirm if she would be selling her book at RIS so I ordered it right beforehand and then voila she ends up selling them and signing them and my copy got to my house while I was at the conference which of course was out of town. The second book I read was Bringing Up Bebe which is about the differences between American parenting and French parenting and the author chose this topic since she had chosen to settle in Paris with her husband. This book is so easy to read and is written so well that you wish she could just keep going. I realized when reading this book that I am a blend of both types of parents and maybe that's because I'm French Canadian but also Irish and Scottish Canadian? I don't know. These books are both great in their own way. The first one will bring you closer to Allah and the second will help you see how others parent their kids and see what you can use or ignore. So whatcha reading? As my 3 yr old says..."share,share, share."

On a sad note the author of the Echoes series;Linda Jamilah Kolocotronis, has passed away. I have no details but her books meant a lot to my family as they were about converts like my son and daughter and I and most recently my daughter-in-law. She herself was a convert as well. Inna ilaihi wa inna ilaihi rajiun. May Allah forgive her sins and grant her jannah. Amin.You can find her books here.

Friday Nasihah

Living The Quran Warning Against Affront Surah al-Ahzab (The Confederates) Chapter 33: Verses 56-62 "God and His angels bless the Prophet. Believers! Bless him and give him greetings of peace. Those who malign God and His Messenger will be rejected by God in this world and in the life to come. He has prepared for them a humiliating suffering. And those who malign believing men and women for no wrong they might have done shall have burdened themselves with the guilt of calumny and with a blatant injustice. Prophet! Say to your wives, daughters and all believing women that they should draw over themselves some of their outer garments. This will be more conducive to their being recognized and not maligned. God is Much-Forgiving, Merciful. If the hypocrites, those who are sick at heart and those who spread lies in the city do not desist, We will rouse you against them, and then they will not be your neighbours in this city except for a little while: bereft of God's grace, they shall be seized wherever they may be found, and will be slain. Such has been God's way with those who went before. Never will you find any change in God's way." The whole universe echoes God's praise of His Prophet. No honour could be greater than this. When God so honours and praises the Prophet, it is exceedingly grotesque for humans to give offence to him. What makes this even more grotesque and ridiculous is that it is an affront to God by His creatures. They can never affront or offend God, but the expression here serves to show great sensitivity to any offence committed against the Prophet, in effect making it an offence against God Himself. God's strong condemnation against maligning believers generally, men and women, suggests that there was in Madinah at the time a group of people who schemed in this way against believers: they defamed them, conspired against them and circulated false allegations about them. God undertakes to reply to the accusers, describing them as hypocrites guilty of calumny and injustice. God Almighty then instructs His Messenger to say to his wives, daughters and Muslim women generally to draw over themselves some of their outer garments. In this way, they would be recognized as Muslim women and the hypocrites would be wise not to follow them to tease and malign them. Commenting on this verse, al-Suddi says: "Some wicked people in Madinah used to go out at nightfall to make indecent remarks to women... When such people saw a woman wrapped in her outer cover, they refrained from maligning her as they recognized her as free and chaste." We note the great care taken to purge all wicked behaviour from the Muslim society. These elements had to be pushed into a narrow corner, while new Islamic values and traditions took firm root in the Muslim community. The passage concludes with a stern warning to the hypocrites and those who were sick at heart as well as those who circulated false rumours requiring that they stop all such wicked action, and refrain from affronting the believers and the Muslim community as a whole. Unless they stopped, God would empower His Messenger to drive them out of Madinah, so that they could be taken and killed wherever they were. Compiled From: "In The Shade Of The Quran" - Sayyid Qutb, Volume 14, pp. 110-112

Understanding the Prophet's Life Rape During the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him) punishment was inflicted on the rapist on the solitary evidence of the woman who was raped by him. Wa'il ibn Hujr reports of an incident when a woman was raped. Later, when some people came by, she identified and accused the man of raping her. They seized him and brought him to Allah's messenger, who said to the woman, "Go away, for Allah has forgiven you," but of the man who had raped her, he said, "Stone him to death." (Tirmidhi and Abu Dawud) Islamic legal scholars interpret rape as a crime in the category of Hiraba. The famous jurist, Ibn Hazm, had the widest definition of hiraba, defining a hiraba offender as: ‘One who puts people in fear on the road, whether or not with a weapon, at night or day, in urban areas or in open spaces, in the palace of a caliph or a mosque, with or without accomplices, in the desert or in the village, in a large or small city, with one or more people… making people fear that they’ll be killed, or have money taken, or be raped (hatk al arad)… whether the attackers are one or many." The Maliki judge Ibn Arabi, relates a story in which a group was attacked and a woman in their party was raped. Responding to the argument that the crime did not constitute hiraba because no money was taken and no weapons used, Ibn Arabi replied indignantly that "hiraba with the private parts" is much worse than hiraba involving the taking of money, and that anyone would rather be subjected to the latter than the former. The crime of rape is classified not as a subcategory of ‘zina’ (consensual adultery), but rather as a separate crime of violence under hiraba. This classification is logical, as the "taking" is of the victim's property (the rape victim’s sexual autonomy) by force. The focus in a hiraba prosecution is the accused rapist and his intent and physical actions, and not second-guessing the consent of the rape victim. Hiraba does not require four witnesses to prove the offense, circumstantial evidence, medical data and expert testimony form the evidence used to prosecute such crimes. Islamic legal responses to rape are not limited to a criminal prosecution for hiraba. Islamic jurisprudence also provides an avenue for civil redress for a rape survivor in its law of "jirah" (wounds). Islamic law designates ownership rights to each part of one's body, and a right to corresponding compensation for any harm done unlawfully to any of those parts. Islamic law calls this the ‘law of jirah’ (wounds). Harm to a sexual organ, therefore, entitles the person harmed to appropriate financial compensation under classical Islamic jirah jurisprudence. Each school of Islamic law has held that where a woman is harmed through rape (some include marital rape), she is entitled to financial compensation for the harm. Further, the perpetrator must pay the woman an additional amount based on the ‘diyya’ (financial compensation for murder, akin to a wrongful death payment). Compiled From: "Rape & Incest: Islamic Perspective" - Uzma Mazhar

Blindspot! Control of Authority One can often read and hear, from Muslims and non-Muslims alike, a translation of shariah as meaning only and strictly "Islamic Law." This understanding and translation are significant: they reveal one of the reductions that took place within Muslim thought over the course of centuries. Ash-shariah, which had been the Way to the light from which the implementation of laws over time and in different environments was thought out, came to be reduced to a set of laws to be implemented formally, as they then were. This understanding and translation reveal reductions that have critical consequences. Civil society, that of ordinary women and men, needs to wake up and call for legal councils and intellectuals to provide comprehensive, but precise and consistent answers to their social, cultural, economic, and political questions. The population, through its commitment and its legitimate demands, must take it on itself to seize control of the authority to which it is entitled. The shift in the centre of gravity of authority involves the return of ordinary women and men to full civic commitment, uncompromising critical questioning, and a collective, practical search for solutions. This is one of the aspects of the crisis and of the shortcomings that can be observed today in the Islamic Universe of reference, always with the same reflexes of defensive formalism as obsessed with otherness, whereas what should be initiated is a confident, universalistic reform movement, which is both wholly inclusive and positively assertive. Compiled From: "Radical Reform: Islamic Ethics and Liberation" - Tariq Ramadan, pp. 271-274