Skating Test

So its been 4 years since I've had MS or a virus or whatever it is that is causing me my troubles. Since I had this I've been unable to skate which is one of my favourite pastimes because of how it connects me to my kids. I'm either teaching them how to skate or enjoying time at the rink with them but no more. For the past few years I've had to sit in the bleachers and ....just watch. Last year I decided to give it a whirl. I went around the rink while holding onto the side but my legs collapsed and my teenage daughter had to bring me back to my seat. This year after going to a homeopath for a year I thought I would try it again. This time I did not collapse but it was still impossible for me to skate. I held onto the sides again and took breaks in the side seats and completed one round and gave up. I'm sure everyone thought I was an immigrant who didn't know how to skate instead of a convert who had been skating for 40 yrs and now had MS or whatever I have. Its depressing but I am grateful for all the years I had to skate and know many people have never had the chance due to worse situations than me like the woman in the wheelchair that I see there often. I am in no way allowed to complain and as Muslims we must not. What saddens me is being cut off from my kids. I wave to them through the window/plexiglass and I help them tie up their skates and take pictures but its not the same. I long one day to skate again with my kids. I am thankful that my youngest quickly learned to skate though with my teen daughter. I am grateful for older kids to take my place but still melancholic. It would also be nice if I knew anyone there to pass the time with as well but for one and half hours each week I peer through the window and enjoy the bliss that is mine; children with the ability and chance to skate for free every week.